Tag Archives: meaning

How to change negative beliefs

Blackboard with banish negative beliefs written on it

Banishing Negative Beliefs

Hiya,

Below is a 6 step negative belief buster process…

Possibly the number one reason people do not reach their goals, or even attempt to reach them in many cases is – negative beliefs.

If you fall in to that category then in this post I aim to give you some tactics to move past them.

#1 Identify them – seems obvious but a lot of the time you may be completely unaware of your own negative beliefs. Ask yourself what is holding you back, what is stopping you reach your goals at the moment?

The answer to this question will reveal a reason or maybe a whole raft of reasons. These reasons are negative beliefs. Whoa! I here you say – these are valid reasons, and they may seem totally valid.

I don’t have the money, I was born in the wrong country, my family needs me, I’m not physically able etc, etc. Sound familiar?

#2 Find evidence that supports them – imagine you were someone else asking you for evidence, what would you say?

Look at my bank account, see, no money. I was born into poverty, this is a poor area in a poor country. I am the only bread winner in the family I can’t go off chasing my dreams.”…you get the idea.

#3 Now identify the meaning of that evidence – does it mean you are destined to remain where you are? Is it fate? Is it God’s plan for you? You weren’t lucky enough to be born with the right circumstances, etc.

#4 Now question if there could be another meaning – maybe it means you have to find your own path to your goals despite the obstacles. Maybe that challenge is the process that will give you the fulfillment. Maybe you are afraid of failing or possibly of the effort that will be required.

#5 Identify the fear – there almost undoubtedly is one. If you can understand what it is, you can deal with it. Fears of this type are usually a challenge to us, they are saying ‘How much do you want this?

#6 Mitigate the fear – find ways to reduce the risk of failure – eg: learn whatever you need to, model what others have done to achieve it, learn to accept failure as part of the journey.

Example:

Imagine a  kid learning to ride bike. First, they say they can’t ride (negative belief). Why can’t they? Because they fell off when they tried (evidence). What did that mean? They can’t ride (meaning). Really, could there be another meaning – like they have to do it over and over before they’ll succeed (alternative meaning). But it hurts (fear). So they should wear a helmet and knee & elbow pads (mitigate fear).

Summary

Whatever your negative belief find someone that has overcome it. Model what they did. If you can’t find someone that did what you want to do, find someone that did something for the first time and model how they did that. You could be the first with your goal. Biographies are a mine of information – read up on those you admire.

It all starts with realising that your belief can be changed. The second step is deciding that you are going to make that change. Remember the 6 keys to success in any area:

#1 Have a clear goal

#2 Understand why you want that

#3 Understand the price of getting that

#4 Decide to pay the price

#5 Pay the price

#6 Keep monitoring how you are doing

 

Enjoy

Stu

🙂

Related posts:

What If You Could?

Making Big Decisions

PS: If you still want to get a copy of “Do You Hate Your Job?” you can get it on Kindle for less than £2 or a pdf copy at no cost right here: FREE Copy

Change Your Mindset,

CLICK HERE

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Filed under Goals, Life changing, Success

Tigers and how they help us understand meaning.

Hiya,

How the tiger can help us change the meaning of things.

How the tiger can help us change the meaning of things.

I just wrote a post on my other blog about how important the  ‘meaning‘ we give things is so influential to our experiences.

(read more…)

Stu

🙂

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Filed under Life changing, Self help, Self Improvement

Can you fall in love with your job? (Pt.3)

Please read the first two parts if you haven’t already where we discuss what bothers you about your job and why:

Read Part 1 Here: Can you fall in love with your job? (Pt.1)

Read Part 2 Here: Can you fall in love with your job? (Pt.2)

In this post we explore…

How You Can Change It

Understanding what your own core values are will be a good indicator if the culture you are working in is a good fit for you. Write a list of your values and compare them with what you think your company stands for. Trust, honesty, fairness, responsibility for example.

In trying to change how you feel about your job The Harvard Business Review advises:

Look at yourself – could you be the cause of the issue?

Find meaning – finding meaning and purpose in what we do often leads to motivation and inspiration.

Alter what you do – by simply acting a different way you will change the results that you get, things could improve by that alone

Change who you interract with – often the catalyst for upset is another person, avoid them if possible, alter how you react to them by using some calming techniques such as deep breathing and pausing before responding

Resist complaining – what you think about you bring about – literally your own complaining could be creating some or all of the dissatisfaction you are experiencing.

Other ways may be to examine your company and identify other departments or sections you’d rather work in, then, retrain to work there if you need to.

Facing your fears can cause massive change too. If you are afraid of asking for a raise or to transfer to another department or to confront that colleague etc. weigh up the pros and cons of acting anyway. What are the potential consequences of facing your fear? Once you identify them they usually shrink – even if it’s just a little. Also, if you can identify them – then accept them, it’s much easier to take that step into the fearful.

Now let’s look on the positive side.

What is it that you like about your job? Everyone likes something about their job, no matter how small. What was it that first excited you about your job? Think of 5 things you like about your job right now and write them down.

Was that difficult? If so, then it’s possible you’re in the wrong job, or the wrong company. If not, then there’s still hope that you can fall in love with your job.

Some Common Mistakes

Let’s identify a couple of mistakes people make (I certainly did) when considering their present career situation.

1. I’m stuck and there’s nothing I can do about it. Actually, you just feel stuck. There’s plenty you can do about it which I’ll be discussing in my next post How to Change Jobs (coming soon).

2. I need to quit this job right now. If you have the finances in place then possibly, if not, this is the worst thing you can do. It’s easier to get a job from a job – ask anyone that’s been unemployed for a while. Take time to consider your options (more about this in my next post).

3. This is the wrong time to look for another job. With the economy as it is, unemployment rising still, inflation out-pacing pay rises – it would certainly seem that way. But actually, recession is a furnace for opportunity and I’ll be discussing how you identify yours in my next post.

Job Change Example

When I decided to quit my job 10 years ago I had previously thought all of the above. I had a ‘stuck in a rut’ mindset for years. That changed, and my circumstances followed shortly after. As I look back I realise I had more options than I could possibly have imagined – fortunately I persued more than one which has led to a much more balanced and fulfilled lifestyle now. This can happen for you too.

Summary

We started by exploring what it is about your present job that bothers you, whether that was a lack of purpose or meaning, lack of opportunity to learn and progress or you’re simply exhausted on a daily basis.

We then discussed ‘why’ these things bothered you. Maybe there are associations being made from previous experiences from when you were younger. We asked if why you chose this job in the first place and why those decisions may have led to your present dissatisfaction.

And today we looked at ways you can change your present circumstances and fall back in love with your job or at least identify whether you need to change it. We wrapped up with some common mistakes people make when they are feeling frustrated and trapped by their job – if this is you, please hold on at least until you’ve read my next post.

In that we will go deeper into how you decide to move on and what you move on to.

Hope you’ve found these last 3 posts useful.

Read Part 1 Here: Can you fall in love with your job? (Pt.1)

Read Part 2 Here: Can you fall in love with your job? (Pt.2)

Enjoy

Stu

🙂

PS: Sign up for my free online video training series here: CLICK HERE and get my daily ‘Ponders Quotes and Questions‘ thought provoking emails automatically.

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Filed under Change Job, Confidence, Goals, Life changing, Self help, Self Improvement, Success

Take the opportunity to understand your WHY.

Hiya,

Do you understand your WHY?
I recently watched a presentation by Greg Habsritt where he talked about
how most companies market themselves based on ‘What‘ they do,
a smart minority market themselves on ‘How‘ they do what they do,
and a smarter, smaller minority market themselves on ‘Why‘ they do
what they do.
It got me thinking about my Why.
At the risk of sounding ‘schmaltzy’ – it really is because I want to
inspire as many people as I can to realise that they CAN do it, whatever
IT is, they just need to know HOW.
Why is that my why?Because I really believe that everybody has the potential to achieve their goals. (Yeah, yeah, blah, blah! – I hear you.)

But think about it – how many times have you heard of the rags to riches success stories? How many entrepreneurs left school early and went on to create massively successful companies? How many athletes overcame enormous odds and went on to fulfil their dream of winning a major competition?

If they did – You can.

My pet hate, something that really gets me grrr! and hits my challenge button – is people that make excuse after excuse for why they can’t do something.

I believe that every one of us has a passion, we have a purpose, and that passion and purpose when ignited, has the potential to not only change our lives, but the lives of all of those around us, all those that we know, and possibly the wider world.

I want to play a part in igniting those passions. I want to be the catalyst for as many people as I can. For those that think they don’t have the brains, or the looks, or the stamina, or the confidence, or the money, or the resources, or the network, or anything else – maybe you don’t, but that might not be what you need to reach your goal.

I believe we are all entitled to live our lives our way and achieve our dreams using our own personal skills, personality, resilience and gumption!

It’s why I took an entire year to write my book:

How To Change Your Life One Day At A Time‘.
It’s why I spent 6 months producing my 90 Day Program:
Change Your Mindset, Change Your Life‘.
It’s why I decided to GIVE that away, as a gift, to everybody that buys
a copy of the book during the launch.Together, the book and the program systematically change a person’s mindset into one that sees the possibilities, sees the opportunities, enabling them to believe that they can achieve their goals, their dreams and live more contented, purposeful, passionate, joyful, happy lives.

Am I going to get rich selling this book. Highly unlikely!

That’s not what it’s about. I already live an abundant lifestyle, I’m by no means rich but I do have certain freedoms earned by running my own business. And I value those freedoms. They give me the opportunity to follow my passion:- helping as many people as I can follow theirs.

So to recap:

My ‘What‘ – A book and complimentary program that’ll guide you to fulfil your potential.My ‘How‘ – By teaching you how to change the way you think and then giving you daily guides that will help you take inspired action.My ‘Why‘ – because I believe you CAN do it – you just need to learn HOW. And that gets me fired up in the morning!Come on, let’s all change the world in our own unique way!

Mark the 20th May on your calendar as launch day.

Take care

Stu

🙂
PS: If you enjoyed this post take a look at the FREE online video series here.

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Filed under Goals, Life changing, Relationships, Self help, Self Improvement, Success