Tag Archives: bullied

How to Change Jobs (Step 2)


So, following on in this series of posts about getting out of a job that you feel trapped in, bullied, overworked, frustrated, used, or in any number of ways are just down right tired of – here’s what to do with your Opportunities List.

If you haven’t read the last 2 posts How to Change Jobs and Obstacles = Opportunities then take a quick look at them as this post will make a lot more sense if you do.

OK, presuming you’ve made your list and you have at least 30 things on there that you could do as well as your present job. Including things such as hobbies, activities that you have a skill in, other things that you just love doing, even if at the moment you don’t think you could make much, or even any money at.

The idea is that writing all these ideas down acts as a brain dump. You get rid of all the chatter and put it on paper – filed out of the way, so that your subconscious can offer forwards other options that you wouldn’t ordinarily think of.

When I first did this exercise after experiencing my catalyst, item number 27 was: start my own print consultancy business. That’s right, the most obvious thing to do for me – which was staring me in the face, which had been suggested many times by colleagues and friends, was simply not on my initial radar. It might seem crazy but we become so programmed by our education system, our family, friends, colleagues etc. that we’re good at something so we should just keep doing that, that when we decide we don’t want to do that anymore, we forget that we can still do it – but for ourselves instead. What we really might be thinking is: I don’t want to do this for someone else anymore.

So, on to prioritising your opportunities – go through your list and put the letter ‘A‘ next to just 10 of those things that you’d really like doing, the ones you’d love. The ones that you would jump excitedly out of bed for in the morning.

Then go back through the list and mark the letter ‘B‘ next to the next 10 things that you could do, if push came to shove,  – even if only on a part time basis.

Then mark the letter ‘C‘ next to all the remaining things that you really don’t want to do, you might be good at them, but you just don’t want to do them.

Now copy just the letter ‘A’s onto a separate sheet of paper.

In my own ‘A‘ list I had painting, writing, starting my own business based on my job, investing in property and teaching amongst other things. Once I had my ‘A‘ list I felt a surge of determination, but I knew I still needed even more focus.

In my next post How to Change Jobs (Step 3) I’ll explain what I did next.

Stay tuned



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Filed under Change Job, Confidence, Goals, Life changing, Self help, Self Improvement, Success

Can you fall in love with your job? (Pt.2)

Why Does Your Job Bother You?

Believe me, it’s very rarely the money although most of us think that’s a big factor.

If you haven’t already read yesterday’s post Can you fall in love with your job? please do – it only takes 2 minutes, and sets the scene for this one.

So, once you’ve written your list of what bothers you, read it a few of times over the next 24 hours as this will help you understand the ‘why’ behind each one. The real ‘why’ – not just because it annoys you, or undermines you, or doesn’t pay well, but rather, see if there is a more emotional reason – such as it reminds you of a time when you were bullied as a child, or reminds you of someone saying you weren’t good enough or trying hard enough.

These associations can have powerful effects on our state of mind, and we can often blow things out of proportion because of them. We all need to be really honest with ourselves as we explore this. A bad association from the past can leave a hair trigger in our subconscious if we let it.

Considering these three questions about why you chose your job will help:

1.Is this the job you dreamed of as a kid?

2. Is this something you stumbled into or maybe were groomed for by a parent or sibling?

3. Did you choose this job just because you needed the work?

If it was what you dreamed of, then in what ways is it not working out as you planned or hoped? It might be the people, maybe some difficult aspects of the work you hadn’t considered, or is it the working environment you don’t like?

If it is something you’ve stumbled or been coerced into, then is it what YOU really want. Who are you trying to please and why? What would happen if you decided to quit?

If it’s just a job because you needed to DO something, what would have to change for you to love it? Are there aspects of it that you do like?

Exploring the answers to these three questions could make it clear ‘why’ you’re dissatisfied right now. Read your list of what bothers you and ask ‘Why does that bother me?’ after each one. Your subconscious will offer up reason after reason, and it probably won’t be the first thing you think of. So as you come up with a reason ask again: ‘Why does THAT bother me?’ and so on until you happen upon a reason that really makes sense. A core reason.

For me I started by thinking that the long hours were what bothered me, then the pressure of constant deadlines, then the interference from my boss in the planning.

As I continued asking ‘why’, all reasons came back to my feeling stifled creatively, and not feeling like I was in control of my own destiny.

Hopefully this exercise will help you discover ‘why’ your present job bothers you and tomorrow we’ll go on to the last part of this article: How You Can Change It.




Related posts:

Can you fall in love with your job? (Pt.1)

Can you fall in love with your job (Pt. 3)


Filed under Change Job, Confidence, Goals, Life changing, Self help, Self Improvement, Success